Healthy Challenge

So, i feel like my boyfriend doesnt find me attractive at all. He used to say it every so often when i was a few stone lighter, and it was really nice to feel pretty and feel like he found me attractive.

He hasnt been like that in ages.

Whenever i come onto him he just kind of lets me, then never actually does anything else. Its like he doesnt even want to touch me. I dont even make an effort anymore with my appearance around him EVER, because even if i did he wouldnt notice so why bother wasting my time? if i stood there in lingerie he probably wouldnt even notice, or if he did he would just say “isnt it a bit cold to wear that?”.

He has no problem mentioning other girls are attractive. for example if someone is on TV and a friend goes “oh shes hot” he will agree and carry on. so i know he is attracted to women, he just isnt attracted to me.

I get angry about it but then i think to myself, well why should i expect him to find me attractive? i dont think i am attractive and i certainly dont look very good naked.

Maybe i just need to man up and cope with it.

My flatmate is moving to china, so as a goodbye we decided to have a chinese themed night tonight with all the pretty laterns etc. this also meant a chinese take away! instead of getting a full chinese i made my own stir fried veg with a bit of rice, and got prawn toast from the take away. i really enjoyed the prawn toast, i am glad i had it, but now im thining “eughhh” as i feel like all the gym effort i have put in has been a waste!

i also had some wine, and i had a glass of apple juice. so lots of extra calories today that i didnt need at all. i feel so disgusted with myself!  i have decided to go to bed now as i feel all grumpy because of it. :( x

Oh my goodness;

Granola layer, yoghurt layer, fruit layer, granola layer, yoghurt layer, fruit layer, granola layer. yohurt layer, sprinkle of coconut and then a dribble of honey on top.

for the fruit i have apple, pear, cherry and grapes.

HMMMMM it was lovely! i was getting sick of having omlettes for breakfast- this has made my day!

xxxxx

Need to start adding more protein into my diet if i want to lose weight.

So, proteins i have available to me are:

milk, yoghurt, cheese (low fat of course!), lentils, beans (all kinds of beans), chickpeas, chicken, turkey, tuna, salmon, mackeral, eggs, oatmeal, brown rice, rye bread.

Sounds delicious! x

Feel really bad for not exercising tonight.. but i dont know why!

went to the gym this morning then been at work this afternoon. Why do i feel bad? i have exerised and eaten healthy all day! x

So, had a few rubbish weeks as i was eating a little bit worse and exercising a littl bit less, and then i felt shit because i put on weight and was like “its not fair!”. I then realised..yes it was fair! I ate out 2 or 3 times that week and i went out with my friends and drank alcohol etc. So yes, it was actually fair that i put a little bit of weight on. I take full responsibilty!

I then had a weekend with a lovely friend of mine and i got back into it all and we exercised and ate healthy and i felt a lot better for it.

I went for a run last night and it felt pretty good! although i only went out for 20 minutes, its better than doing nothing, right?

Then went to the gym this morning and really pushed myself. It really makes you think about why we ever let ourselves get out of exercising when it actually feels really good and releases such happy hormones into your blood stream? Crazy.

xxxxxxxx

(Source: mycollectionofskins, via improvingmyself)

twentyoneandrunning asked: you should do a 5 minute youtube workout :)

think i will do the exercise 2night before i go to bed. i feel a lot better today on the aching calfs! x

findingthinagain asked: Hey, I just saw gettinghealthyandhappy recommend you, and I read your about me and I just wanted to say that your story is really inspiring and I wish you the best of luck :)

heya lovely:)

Thankyou ever so much. I really want to stick to it the healthy way this time. Im sick of starving and being tired! and now im sick of being over-weight and chubby! its hard to go from one extreme to another and this time  i will do it healthy and properly!

Your story is really inspiring too. and i love that you give people advice-it shows you really care :) xxxx